Being overweight is so hard. Being obese is even harder.
Not only are you plagued by physical health problems, but you face emotional issues such as depression as well. Then along comes help. First in the form of a pill by our pharmaceautical society and then if that doesn't work [and it never does], don't worry, more help is now available, surgery. I am truly amazed at how popular weight loss surgery has become over the last 5 years. So, is surgery YOUR only option if you are obese?
I attended an event last week. It was for a women's group, local leaders and workers, and the focus was on health & wellness. It was a great opportunity and I met and talked with many outstanding women before the program began. Then the sponsor spoke. It took everything I had to stay in my chair. Before the meeting, I noticed a representative putting flyers on each seat, explaining how a new weight-loss surgery could help you lose weight. I was very distressed to see this. Then the sponsor spoke.
This gentleman was a very distinguished doctor. He had excellent credentials, which he explained. He worked for a very reputable medical center in our community. And then he proceeded to explain more about obesity. His first statement that astounded me [yes, I took notes so I would get it right] "To treat the disease of obesity, surgery is the only option".
Aaaggghhh!!!
And then his second statement "Obesity is not a lifestyle choice".
Double aaaggghhh!!!
He continued to elaborate on how successful the surgeries are and how safe they are. He was very technical and talked in a monotone voice and did not look at the women as he spoke. Now I may be oversensitive because I deal with this issue every day, but all I could see was a room full of maybe impressional, smart, professional women who were all waiting to hear what this "medical expert" had to say, how he could help them. And he just told them that surgery was their only option.
Luckily I had a chance to speak with many women afterwards and we did talk about the other options. But the damage had already been done. How many times are we faced with lies like this, how many times a day? TV ads and programs, radio advertisements, magazine and newspaper ads promising instant results. Pills, programs, and now surgeries -- all to handle the one little thing that keeps growing in our society - obesity.
So is surgery the only option?
Please know that I am not a physician. I cannot walk you through this complicated surgery and explain the details to you. I do not work for a large medical company. I do NOT endorse pills or fat-burning products.
I am a fitness professional. I am a certified Fitness Trainer. I am a certified Specialist in Performance Nutrition. I own a health and wellness company Start With The Inside. I was obese, for 8 years. I am not obese now, and have not been for almost 9 years now.
And I see obesity and it's affects in my clients every day. And in my experience, I can tell you that the most prevalent issue in obesity is not the physical problems that accompany it, but the EMOTIONAL issues that lead up to a person being overweight or obese.
Poor self-esteem
Depression
Bad relationships
Not knowing how to communicate
Not knowing how to handle stress
Bad habits
Over consumption of comfort foods
-and- my favorite
Pushing things under the rug so you don't have to deal with them
Sound familiar anyone?
I have empathy for anyone who is obese. I truly do. I know what it was like for me. It was miserable. I was miserable. You become more and more desperate as each pound comes on. And when people come along, or products, that promise results, are easier than facing the facts, we, in our fast-food, give-it-to-me-now-and-I'll-worry-about-it-later society, we are easily influenced by all of these promises.
It's easier than dealing with the EMOTIONAL issues, right?
Yes, it is easier. But it's much harder to recover from. Weight loss surgery is cutting open your body and doing something that is unnatural, it is just not natural. Does it sound natural? Does it look natural? And what are you faced with after surgery? A broken body that can recover, but your emotional issues are still there, left undealt with. Is the distinguished doctor with excellent credentials going to be there to help you - to help you deal with even more emotional issues now? Honestly? I don't think he will be there. I think he, along with his collegues, will be celebrating another notch in their belt, another scientific accomplishment, another thousands of dollars to him and the medical industry.
I know it's hard to deal with the emotional issues, but you HAVE to. You have to find out WHY you are in this situation. You have to change your habits. You have to change the way you talk to yourself. You have to start with the inside. And I know you can do it. Do it today!
Monday, December 7, 2009
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Can You Maintain Your Weight Over The Holidays?
Okay, so you decide not to lose any weight over the holidays, just maintain.
So how do you do that?
This week is tough, the week after Thanksgiving. I see three kinds of clients - those who blew it nutritionally on the big meal day, those who kind of blew it on the big meal day, and those who did great on the big meal day and then proceeded to blow it over the weekend on their nutritional plans.
Hmmm...
Is it possible to maintain your weight over the holidays?
First of all, what is it to maintain? The dictionary says: "to keep or keep up; continue in or with; carry on". Okay, maintenance? The dictionary says: "upkeep, support, defense". A great coach once told me that maintenance is not the lack of work. You still have to be focused, you still have to be sharp and not let your guard down. You still have to work. And when you are trying to lose weight, let's be honest, that's work.
One of my diehard clients had this to say about maintenance during the holidays: "The way I see it - the holidays are Nov. 26, Dec. 24, 25 and 31st. Why do I need a whole month of maintenance?" By the way, I love this client! She is making progress and has a great mindset. She is continuing to work hard during the month of December, even with obstacles in her way. But what she said is true - we are only talking about 4 days here! So why does everyone take off in the month of December?
It's too stressful so you don't have time [make time] to workout.
It's too many parties so you can't eat right [make good choices].
It's too cold outside to workout and I don't have a treadmill [give me a jumprope or a bench and I'll prove you wrong].
It gets dark early so I can't workout outside [duh, go inside].
It's just too darn BUSY! [get over it, workout!].
You can maintain during the holiday season. It starts with what you tell yourself and how you speak about the holidays.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I'm just too tired to even think about exercising right now" - guess what? You'll be too tired to exercise.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I know I shouldn't eat this, but I'll get back on-track in January" - guess what? You'll be mad at yourself and chances are, you'll have an even harder time in January getting back on-track.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I'm just too busy, I am just going from one thing to another, I can't think about being healthy right now" - guess what? You'll continue being busy, you'll continue going from one thing to another, and you won't be healthy.
It doesn't take long for this to affect your body. Sicknesses seem to come along, whereas you may have been able to fend it off before, now you cannot. You get wore down, everyday activities wear you down. You get tired of celebrating. You get tired of overindulging, but it's a habit now. You just get tired. A bad December can last through March, I know, I've done it in the past. Why do you think the gyms are so crowded in January and February?
Take the advice from my client, it's only 4 days of celebration, it's not 31 days. And take my advice, you'll feel better. Keep moving, keep eating right, keep telling yourself that you can do it. And before you know it, the holidays will be over.
You MAKE the choice - every day.
YOU CHOOSE to live healthy
or
YOU CHOOSE to live unhealthy
Whatever you choose, own up to it.
So how do you do that?
This week is tough, the week after Thanksgiving. I see three kinds of clients - those who blew it nutritionally on the big meal day, those who kind of blew it on the big meal day, and those who did great on the big meal day and then proceeded to blow it over the weekend on their nutritional plans.
Hmmm...
Is it possible to maintain your weight over the holidays?
First of all, what is it to maintain? The dictionary says: "to keep or keep up; continue in or with; carry on". Okay, maintenance? The dictionary says: "upkeep, support, defense". A great coach once told me that maintenance is not the lack of work. You still have to be focused, you still have to be sharp and not let your guard down. You still have to work. And when you are trying to lose weight, let's be honest, that's work.
One of my diehard clients had this to say about maintenance during the holidays: "The way I see it - the holidays are Nov. 26, Dec. 24, 25 and 31st. Why do I need a whole month of maintenance?" By the way, I love this client! She is making progress and has a great mindset. She is continuing to work hard during the month of December, even with obstacles in her way. But what she said is true - we are only talking about 4 days here! So why does everyone take off in the month of December?
It's too stressful so you don't have time [make time] to workout.
It's too many parties so you can't eat right [make good choices].
It's too cold outside to workout and I don't have a treadmill [give me a jumprope or a bench and I'll prove you wrong].
It gets dark early so I can't workout outside [duh, go inside].
It's just too darn BUSY! [get over it, workout!].
You can maintain during the holiday season. It starts with what you tell yourself and how you speak about the holidays.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I'm just too tired to even think about exercising right now" - guess what? You'll be too tired to exercise.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I know I shouldn't eat this, but I'll get back on-track in January" - guess what? You'll be mad at yourself and chances are, you'll have an even harder time in January getting back on-track.
If you say, to yourself AND others, "I'm just too busy, I am just going from one thing to another, I can't think about being healthy right now" - guess what? You'll continue being busy, you'll continue going from one thing to another, and you won't be healthy.
It doesn't take long for this to affect your body. Sicknesses seem to come along, whereas you may have been able to fend it off before, now you cannot. You get wore down, everyday activities wear you down. You get tired of celebrating. You get tired of overindulging, but it's a habit now. You just get tired. A bad December can last through March, I know, I've done it in the past. Why do you think the gyms are so crowded in January and February?
Take the advice from my client, it's only 4 days of celebration, it's not 31 days. And take my advice, you'll feel better. Keep moving, keep eating right, keep telling yourself that you can do it. And before you know it, the holidays will be over.
You MAKE the choice - every day.
YOU CHOOSE to live healthy
or
YOU CHOOSE to live unhealthy
Whatever you choose, own up to it.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Chocolate - Is It Good For You?
Chocolate is great for you...no wait...chocolate is bad for you...no wait...chocolate is good for you - well, food and health industry - which is it?
Is chocolate good for you? Or is it bad?
Each day I am bombarded with "new" information on what is considered healthy and what is not - does that ever happen to you? And do you ever see the information contradicting itself as I do? Sometimes it makes you want to sit back and think...hmmm...what is the money trail here? Is it the big bad chocolate companies that are making money from our chocolate addiction or could it be the "health" industry doesn't really want us to be healthy, because then we wouldn't buy their products that claim to cut your body fat from a pill or a shake?
This is a hard topic for me because...I am a chocolate addict. Know anyone else who is? Yeah, that's what I thought.
When you are young, you are rewarded with chocolate. Growing up as a young lady, you start using it as a weapon against the dreaded PMS symptoms. Here, eat some chocolate, it will make you feel better. When you combine that with other not-so-healthy foods, you get other addictions including ice cream, candy bars, candy and other high calorie foods. Before you know it, you just need a little bit, maybe every day, to get by. Just a little bit won't hurt, right?
Hang onto your hats because I'm going to go against the grain again, or as my daughter says, go in the out door again...
Chocolate is not healthy for you.
There, I said it. I am not a scientist so I cannot give you the scientific breakdown of why. I am not a pharmacist, so I cannot give you the biological breakdown of why. I am not a physician, so I cannot give you the logical breakdown of why. And finally I am not a drug pusher, so I cannnot give you a reason to not want it.
I am a fitness professional. I see what chocolate does, an overabudance of chocolate, does to bodies. I see what it does to young people who view it as a reward. I see what it does to young women who use it for PMS symptoms. I see what it does to 40-year old women who are addicted to it and are obese and just can't give it up.
I've been all of them. And maybe so have you.
What is the psychological reason for chocolate to keep coming up, time after time? I mean really? What is the reason it comes up in common conversations with women everywhere? Chocolate is good for you. Chocolate is bad for you. What's the real reason?
Is it an emotional drug?
Is it comparable to a drug?
I don't have the answers for you. All I know is that if it affects your body in a negative way, i.e. sugar high/crash, obesity, overweight, then you have to give it up. You just have to give it up. You have to put your blinders on, regardless of the next newest report that is going to come out and say how healthy it is. Any true chocolate lover knows that it cannot be THAT good for you. I've quit it before, I've had relapses before, but most importantly, I recognize that it is a problem for me and I treat it as such. It is not part of my daily life. It can't be. Chocolate is very good at replacing emotions or feelings. The hard part is when you give it up, you must deal with those emotions or feelings and stop using chocolate as a way to escape.
Oh, yeah, that's the hard part.
Is chocolate good for you? Tell me, what do you think?
Is chocolate good for you? Or is it bad?
Each day I am bombarded with "new" information on what is considered healthy and what is not - does that ever happen to you? And do you ever see the information contradicting itself as I do? Sometimes it makes you want to sit back and think...hmmm...what is the money trail here? Is it the big bad chocolate companies that are making money from our chocolate addiction or could it be the "health" industry doesn't really want us to be healthy, because then we wouldn't buy their products that claim to cut your body fat from a pill or a shake?
This is a hard topic for me because...I am a chocolate addict. Know anyone else who is? Yeah, that's what I thought.
When you are young, you are rewarded with chocolate. Growing up as a young lady, you start using it as a weapon against the dreaded PMS symptoms. Here, eat some chocolate, it will make you feel better. When you combine that with other not-so-healthy foods, you get other addictions including ice cream, candy bars, candy and other high calorie foods. Before you know it, you just need a little bit, maybe every day, to get by. Just a little bit won't hurt, right?
Hang onto your hats because I'm going to go against the grain again, or as my daughter says, go in the out door again...
Chocolate is not healthy for you.
There, I said it. I am not a scientist so I cannot give you the scientific breakdown of why. I am not a pharmacist, so I cannot give you the biological breakdown of why. I am not a physician, so I cannot give you the logical breakdown of why. And finally I am not a drug pusher, so I cannnot give you a reason to not want it.
I am a fitness professional. I see what chocolate does, an overabudance of chocolate, does to bodies. I see what it does to young people who view it as a reward. I see what it does to young women who use it for PMS symptoms. I see what it does to 40-year old women who are addicted to it and are obese and just can't give it up.
I've been all of them. And maybe so have you.
What is the psychological reason for chocolate to keep coming up, time after time? I mean really? What is the reason it comes up in common conversations with women everywhere? Chocolate is good for you. Chocolate is bad for you. What's the real reason?
Is it an emotional drug?
Is it comparable to a drug?
I don't have the answers for you. All I know is that if it affects your body in a negative way, i.e. sugar high/crash, obesity, overweight, then you have to give it up. You just have to give it up. You have to put your blinders on, regardless of the next newest report that is going to come out and say how healthy it is. Any true chocolate lover knows that it cannot be THAT good for you. I've quit it before, I've had relapses before, but most importantly, I recognize that it is a problem for me and I treat it as such. It is not part of my daily life. It can't be. Chocolate is very good at replacing emotions or feelings. The hard part is when you give it up, you must deal with those emotions or feelings and stop using chocolate as a way to escape.
Oh, yeah, that's the hard part.
Is chocolate good for you? Tell me, what do you think?
Monday, November 23, 2009
Thanksgiving Day Survival - Part Two
Part Two...which is worse? Is it the overload of food that drives you crazy or the overload of relatives that drives you to food?
As I counsel more and more clients on how to actually survive Thanksgiving Day - not overeating, eating healthy foods, drinking water, etc. - one thing keeps coming up, family dynamics. Every family is unique and in my belief, every family is somewhat dysfunctional. And it's funny, the personalities that are similar, the characters that are similar in every family and it seems that there's always one [sometimes more] that just knows how to push the buttons when you are trying to eat right. For the purpose of this blog, we'll call that person "crazy". I know, just hang with me...
So, you try to prepare for the day. You cook good foods, you know what you want to do, you're drinking your water, everything is fine and then boom, crazy does something crazy and you find yourself taking an extra slice of pie, going back for thirds and fourths, having another glass of wine and before you know it, you're sitting on the sofa unbuckling your belt and unsnapping the top botton on your pants and you're miserable. Crazy keeps going crazy, 'cause that's what she/he does and you wonder where you went wrong. Huh?
How can this be avoided?
You can't control crazy - so what are you supposed to do?
You're right. You can't control crazy. Crazy is as crazy does. Crazy has been acting crazy because she/he has always done it and just gets away with it. Doesn't matter if it is right or wrong. You're in a family, you're supposed to forgive and forget, right? Then why are you always the one trying to get crazy to stop acting crazy?
When a family gets together, it should be a good event. There should be laughter, friendship, fellowship, sharing, happiness. And sometimes there is. But sometimes there is jealousy, disagreements, different parenting styles, different opinions, sadness. And when you add food into the equation, lots of food, oftentimes it just gets caught up in the moment and you overeat. Some people find it very difficult to get together with family and not overeat, esp. when they start living a healthy lifestyle. For one thing, you are more aware. You are more aware of what you are eating, how your body is responding and your emotions. Overeating is equated with not being aware, not being aware of how your body is responding [until it's too late] and covering up your emotions. With Food.
I know this is a sensitive topic and I'm not going to sugarcoat it for you.
I could make a lot of money selling products and packages, but I choose not to, because I want you to know the truth. And the truth is you have to start with the inside. You have to make the decisions to face your problems, to face the crazy's out there, to put what you KNOW about nutrition into action and then, just to DO IT.
Crazy is not going away. So deal with it. Find a way to deal with it.
In my personal life, it was about boundaries with crazy. I had to decide to go with my instincts and limit contact with crazy. This was not liked by some in my family. Too harsh. Not forgiving and forgetting. I had to make it a point to not be around crazy in order to limit any affects that crazy could have in my life. And this meant affecting the dynamics of our family get-togethers. It was hard, but so worth it as now I have eliminated that problem and don't overeat because I can't handle a crazy person. Do what it takes.
What is crazy's objective? In my case, it was "if it's not about crazy, it's not about crazy, and on and on" all attention had to be on crazy and it usually was, one way or another. So, take that attention away. It doesn't mean that crazy is going to change, it means that you are.
You change your environment.
You change your reactions.
You change your patterns.
You get healthy. Don't wait for another holiday to just get by, do it now. Prepare yourself emotionally to make it through Thanksgiving Day. I know you can do it. Just start with the inside...
As I counsel more and more clients on how to actually survive Thanksgiving Day - not overeating, eating healthy foods, drinking water, etc. - one thing keeps coming up, family dynamics. Every family is unique and in my belief, every family is somewhat dysfunctional. And it's funny, the personalities that are similar, the characters that are similar in every family and it seems that there's always one [sometimes more] that just knows how to push the buttons when you are trying to eat right. For the purpose of this blog, we'll call that person "crazy". I know, just hang with me...
So, you try to prepare for the day. You cook good foods, you know what you want to do, you're drinking your water, everything is fine and then boom, crazy does something crazy and you find yourself taking an extra slice of pie, going back for thirds and fourths, having another glass of wine and before you know it, you're sitting on the sofa unbuckling your belt and unsnapping the top botton on your pants and you're miserable. Crazy keeps going crazy, 'cause that's what she/he does and you wonder where you went wrong. Huh?
How can this be avoided?
You can't control crazy - so what are you supposed to do?
You're right. You can't control crazy. Crazy is as crazy does. Crazy has been acting crazy because she/he has always done it and just gets away with it. Doesn't matter if it is right or wrong. You're in a family, you're supposed to forgive and forget, right? Then why are you always the one trying to get crazy to stop acting crazy?
When a family gets together, it should be a good event. There should be laughter, friendship, fellowship, sharing, happiness. And sometimes there is. But sometimes there is jealousy, disagreements, different parenting styles, different opinions, sadness. And when you add food into the equation, lots of food, oftentimes it just gets caught up in the moment and you overeat. Some people find it very difficult to get together with family and not overeat, esp. when they start living a healthy lifestyle. For one thing, you are more aware. You are more aware of what you are eating, how your body is responding and your emotions. Overeating is equated with not being aware, not being aware of how your body is responding [until it's too late] and covering up your emotions. With Food.
I know this is a sensitive topic and I'm not going to sugarcoat it for you.
I could make a lot of money selling products and packages, but I choose not to, because I want you to know the truth. And the truth is you have to start with the inside. You have to make the decisions to face your problems, to face the crazy's out there, to put what you KNOW about nutrition into action and then, just to DO IT.
Crazy is not going away. So deal with it. Find a way to deal with it.
In my personal life, it was about boundaries with crazy. I had to decide to go with my instincts and limit contact with crazy. This was not liked by some in my family. Too harsh. Not forgiving and forgetting. I had to make it a point to not be around crazy in order to limit any affects that crazy could have in my life. And this meant affecting the dynamics of our family get-togethers. It was hard, but so worth it as now I have eliminated that problem and don't overeat because I can't handle a crazy person. Do what it takes.
What is crazy's objective? In my case, it was "if it's not about crazy, it's not about crazy, and on and on" all attention had to be on crazy and it usually was, one way or another. So, take that attention away. It doesn't mean that crazy is going to change, it means that you are.
You change your environment.
You change your reactions.
You change your patterns.
You get healthy. Don't wait for another holiday to just get by, do it now. Prepare yourself emotionally to make it through Thanksgiving Day. I know you can do it. Just start with the inside...
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
How To Make It Through Thanksgiving Dinner...
When you are trying to lose weight [or maintain your weight], Thanksgiving Dinner is like going on a cruise. You are going to be around a lot of people, there is tons of food and drink, and the odds of you coming away from it pounds lighter are very slim.
It doesn't have to be that way.
Thanksgiving should be a time to celebrate our country's heritage, a time to fellowship with our family and friends, a time to rejoice that we are alive and healthy, a time to enjoy good food.
Yes, that's right. Good food. You can find good food on a cruise, too. No really, you can.
Thanksgiving Day food-wise is only as hard as you make it.
So, what do you do?
Here's my top tips:
• First and foremost, have a positive attitude about food. If you go into this Day [or a cruise] thinking and SAYING "I am going to blow it, I know it", then guess what? You will blow it. If you go into it fearful and paranoid thinking and saying "I'm afraid I am going to blow it, I just know it", then guess what? You will most likely blow it. However, let's think positive. Why not? Has the other options worked? Think and SAY "I know I can do good on this day and I will do good on this day". Your body responds to what your mind tells it, right? Then focus on the positive. Give yourself a chance to do good, then do it.
• Along the same lines, STOP saying the word "BAD". Example - "I know this is BAD for me", "This is a BAD food", "I know I'm going to be BAD". Stop calling foods BAD. Foods are life, foods are energy. You need life, you need energy. Now, granted, some foods are better than others, but don't go into it saying that all foods are BAD and BAD for you. Again, negative connotation associated with food. Think positive about food.
• It's all about portion control. Let me ask you a question - typically, on a Thanksgiving dinner, would you say that you probably eat about twice what you normally would eat? If your answer is 'yes', then I would say to you, then why not take 1/2 of what you would normally eat? You're not going to starve. When you are looking at the gorgeous buffet table all decked out, take your plate, and start piling it on - but take only 1/2 of what you would normally take. You know, just because there is a big serving spoon in a casserole - IT DOESN'T MEAN that you have to take a serving spoon size. Cut it in HALF!
• Get some balls. No, not turkey balls or dressing balls, or even pumpkin pie balls, I'm talking about guts. Well, let me rephrase again. Build up some nerves, be brave and learn to say no. Now I know you are going to see Aunt Sally just once this year and she just slaved over that sweet potato-marshmallow-brown sugar delight just for you because it's your absolute favorite. So eat some of it. Remember, 1/2 of what you would normally take. Are you offending her? No. Is everyone in the room watching every thing you are eating? No. [most of the times, they are so concerned with what they are eating]. When Aunt Sally comes around with the dish to give you more, you just tell her that you had it and it was absolutely wonderful and maybe you'll have some more later. No need to scream or cry or explain your dietary restrictions or even the dreaded, ahhh, "I'm trying to lose weight". Just get some balls about you and say no. No big deal. It's a big deal if YOU make it a big deal. If Aunt Sally chooses to make it a big deal, then that is her problem, not yours.
Friends, I know you know what to eat. You tell me all the time. You hear it all the time. I can give you all kinds of tips that tell you what kind of food to eat, what to drink, how to exercise - and believe me, THOSE THINGS are very important. But most of you already know those. What I want to share with you is how to EMOTIONALLY prepare yourself for this meal or this day.
Again, it is only as hard as you make it.
So make it fun. Make it a day to celebrate. Make it a day to enjoy your family and friends and yes, good food. Get your exercise in, watch your portions and be reasonable. It's okay to take a day off your normal routine, as long as you get back in your normal routine afterwards, not a week afterwards, a day afterwards.
Best wishes to you all as you celebrate Thanksgiving. You know what do to, so now go do it.
Sandi
It doesn't have to be that way.
Thanksgiving should be a time to celebrate our country's heritage, a time to fellowship with our family and friends, a time to rejoice that we are alive and healthy, a time to enjoy good food.
Yes, that's right. Good food. You can find good food on a cruise, too. No really, you can.
Thanksgiving Day food-wise is only as hard as you make it.
So, what do you do?
Here's my top tips:
• First and foremost, have a positive attitude about food. If you go into this Day [or a cruise] thinking and SAYING "I am going to blow it, I know it", then guess what? You will blow it. If you go into it fearful and paranoid thinking and saying "I'm afraid I am going to blow it, I just know it", then guess what? You will most likely blow it. However, let's think positive. Why not? Has the other options worked? Think and SAY "I know I can do good on this day and I will do good on this day". Your body responds to what your mind tells it, right? Then focus on the positive. Give yourself a chance to do good, then do it.
• Along the same lines, STOP saying the word "BAD". Example - "I know this is BAD for me", "This is a BAD food", "I know I'm going to be BAD". Stop calling foods BAD. Foods are life, foods are energy. You need life, you need energy. Now, granted, some foods are better than others, but don't go into it saying that all foods are BAD and BAD for you. Again, negative connotation associated with food. Think positive about food.
• It's all about portion control. Let me ask you a question - typically, on a Thanksgiving dinner, would you say that you probably eat about twice what you normally would eat? If your answer is 'yes', then I would say to you, then why not take 1/2 of what you would normally eat? You're not going to starve. When you are looking at the gorgeous buffet table all decked out, take your plate, and start piling it on - but take only 1/2 of what you would normally take. You know, just because there is a big serving spoon in a casserole - IT DOESN'T MEAN that you have to take a serving spoon size. Cut it in HALF!
• Get some balls. No, not turkey balls or dressing balls, or even pumpkin pie balls, I'm talking about guts. Well, let me rephrase again. Build up some nerves, be brave and learn to say no. Now I know you are going to see Aunt Sally just once this year and she just slaved over that sweet potato-marshmallow-brown sugar delight just for you because it's your absolute favorite. So eat some of it. Remember, 1/2 of what you would normally take. Are you offending her? No. Is everyone in the room watching every thing you are eating? No. [most of the times, they are so concerned with what they are eating]. When Aunt Sally comes around with the dish to give you more, you just tell her that you had it and it was absolutely wonderful and maybe you'll have some more later. No need to scream or cry or explain your dietary restrictions or even the dreaded, ahhh, "I'm trying to lose weight". Just get some balls about you and say no. No big deal. It's a big deal if YOU make it a big deal. If Aunt Sally chooses to make it a big deal, then that is her problem, not yours.
Friends, I know you know what to eat. You tell me all the time. You hear it all the time. I can give you all kinds of tips that tell you what kind of food to eat, what to drink, how to exercise - and believe me, THOSE THINGS are very important. But most of you already know those. What I want to share with you is how to EMOTIONALLY prepare yourself for this meal or this day.
Again, it is only as hard as you make it.
So make it fun. Make it a day to celebrate. Make it a day to enjoy your family and friends and yes, good food. Get your exercise in, watch your portions and be reasonable. It's okay to take a day off your normal routine, as long as you get back in your normal routine afterwards, not a week afterwards, a day afterwards.
Best wishes to you all as you celebrate Thanksgiving. You know what do to, so now go do it.
Sandi
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
What To Do When Your Support Isn't Supporting You
Weight loss is a battle! You feel like you are fighting against your body - do the workouts, eat the proper way, cut out certain things, add others, push, pull all the time. You set goals, you start seeing results and then it happens, your support isn't supporting you. Now what do you do?
Your support can be your spouse, friends, co-workers, other family members. Usually it is someone you are close to, someone you live with or spend a lot of time with during the days. And it's not like they don't know your goals, they do. You probably shared your goals with them, or they may be on the journey with you. Either way, something happens and they let you down.
It could be something they said, something they did, a behavior change. Whatever it is, it throws you off balance and you start to slide. Maybe you eat a little candy or miss a workout, just once. Then it happens again and you slip again, a couple of times a week. Your weight-loss progress starts to slow down and the once-a-week's become several-times-a-week or weeklys. You start to get discouraged. And you're not getting the support now from your support.
This is a cycle I see often in the weight-loss battle. I've been through it myself. It's not fun.
It could be a spouse who doesn't want you to workout in the morning.
It could be a friend who makes a snide comment about your nutrition plan.
It could be a co-worker who always has candy and everything else you are trying to avoid and is constantly offering it to you.
It could be a family member who just loses touch with you and blames it on you spending too much time on yourself.
How can you do it without your support?
How can you lose weight without support?
Most of my clients have heard my "hubby-support" story about when I was in a 12-week weight-loss contest [leannesslifestyle.com] and I had made the decision to give up ice cream for the 12-week period. Was it required? No. But I knew it was hindering my progress and so I made the decision, informed by family and was determined to stick to my guns. The first weekend, and oh, the weekends are so tough when you are trying to lose weight, my supportive, type-A husband came home with 2 bags. I knew it wasn't going to be good because I can tell a mile away a grocery bag that has ice cream in it. Call it extra-sensitive perception or whatever, I know ice cream in a bag when I see it! He happily proclaimed "Hey baby, Kroger was having a sale, buy-one-get-one free, so I bought two and got two free!"
He said this as if he were expecting me to jump up and down and kiss and hug him.
Didn't happen.
In fact, quite the opposite. I was not happy. Did he not hear me just a few days ago when I shared with him my goals? Did he not understand it? I don't get it.
He didn't get it either. But I had made a commitment and I was going to stick by my commitment. I didn't eat any ice cream and by the weekend's end, the ice cream was gone and I hadn't had one bite. This continued the ENTIRE 12 weeks. I continued the entire 12 weeks. Not one bite of ice cream. Did I make my goal? Uh, yes, I sure did! That was 8 years ago.
I had to make a decision, not only about my spouse supporting me, but about others around me as well. I had to endure the snide comments, the lack of understanding from co-workers or friends, the lack of support from family.
And I just shut up and did it.
One of the major problems women have in losing weight is the TIME they have to spend on themselves during the process. They have to workout, they have to eat right, they make decisions every day about their health. And it INTERFERES with other's plans. And that's where the conflict comes in. Your support person may not want you to change. They may say they do, but in reality, they don't. They want the same person to look a certain way [for whatever reasons], they want your focus to be on them, they don't like CHANGE.
And to that, I say, you have to make a decision. You have to decide what is more important:
-Being the person that your support person wants you to be, no matter if you are healthy or not.
or
-Being the person that you know you want to be.
The hard part is that you might lose someone along the way. You may lose a friend. You may lose a co-worker. And here's the hardest part, you may lose a spouse.
If someone loves you, then they should accept you the way you are. And if you want to change the way you are, a true supporter will love you anyway.
I was fortunate that my spouse continued to support me, well, he is lucky :) but I had to lose support in other areas. I don't have parents that support me. And you can go on, you think about it, you grieve about it, but overall, you just get over it. That's one of the reasons I get so "clingy" and scared when I am facing a big race or an accomplishment. You always want your parents to be proud of you and I don't have that. I have a husband who loves me and my kids and sisters, but that's it. I'll never hear "good job Sandi" from my parents, so I look for other ways to hear it, from friends and family, but when it comes down to it, I am my biggest supporter.
I am the one who tells myself "great job Sandi".
I am the one who is doing the hard work.
I am the one who is living a healthy life and proud of it.
Take the focus off your support and put it on you. It's okay to do that. Now, make a commitment to yourself and don't let yourself down. And pretty soon you'll be telling yourself as well "great job!"
Your support can be your spouse, friends, co-workers, other family members. Usually it is someone you are close to, someone you live with or spend a lot of time with during the days. And it's not like they don't know your goals, they do. You probably shared your goals with them, or they may be on the journey with you. Either way, something happens and they let you down.
It could be something they said, something they did, a behavior change. Whatever it is, it throws you off balance and you start to slide. Maybe you eat a little candy or miss a workout, just once. Then it happens again and you slip again, a couple of times a week. Your weight-loss progress starts to slow down and the once-a-week's become several-times-a-week or weeklys. You start to get discouraged. And you're not getting the support now from your support.
This is a cycle I see often in the weight-loss battle. I've been through it myself. It's not fun.
It could be a spouse who doesn't want you to workout in the morning.
It could be a friend who makes a snide comment about your nutrition plan.
It could be a co-worker who always has candy and everything else you are trying to avoid and is constantly offering it to you.
It could be a family member who just loses touch with you and blames it on you spending too much time on yourself.
How can you do it without your support?
How can you lose weight without support?
Most of my clients have heard my "hubby-support" story about when I was in a 12-week weight-loss contest [leannesslifestyle.com] and I had made the decision to give up ice cream for the 12-week period. Was it required? No. But I knew it was hindering my progress and so I made the decision, informed by family and was determined to stick to my guns. The first weekend, and oh, the weekends are so tough when you are trying to lose weight, my supportive, type-A husband came home with 2 bags. I knew it wasn't going to be good because I can tell a mile away a grocery bag that has ice cream in it. Call it extra-sensitive perception or whatever, I know ice cream in a bag when I see it! He happily proclaimed "Hey baby, Kroger was having a sale, buy-one-get-one free, so I bought two and got two free!"
He said this as if he were expecting me to jump up and down and kiss and hug him.
Didn't happen.
In fact, quite the opposite. I was not happy. Did he not hear me just a few days ago when I shared with him my goals? Did he not understand it? I don't get it.
He didn't get it either. But I had made a commitment and I was going to stick by my commitment. I didn't eat any ice cream and by the weekend's end, the ice cream was gone and I hadn't had one bite. This continued the ENTIRE 12 weeks. I continued the entire 12 weeks. Not one bite of ice cream. Did I make my goal? Uh, yes, I sure did! That was 8 years ago.
I had to make a decision, not only about my spouse supporting me, but about others around me as well. I had to endure the snide comments, the lack of understanding from co-workers or friends, the lack of support from family.
And I just shut up and did it.
One of the major problems women have in losing weight is the TIME they have to spend on themselves during the process. They have to workout, they have to eat right, they make decisions every day about their health. And it INTERFERES with other's plans. And that's where the conflict comes in. Your support person may not want you to change. They may say they do, but in reality, they don't. They want the same person to look a certain way [for whatever reasons], they want your focus to be on them, they don't like CHANGE.
And to that, I say, you have to make a decision. You have to decide what is more important:
-Being the person that your support person wants you to be, no matter if you are healthy or not.
or
-Being the person that you know you want to be.
The hard part is that you might lose someone along the way. You may lose a friend. You may lose a co-worker. And here's the hardest part, you may lose a spouse.
If someone loves you, then they should accept you the way you are. And if you want to change the way you are, a true supporter will love you anyway.
I was fortunate that my spouse continued to support me, well, he is lucky :) but I had to lose support in other areas. I don't have parents that support me. And you can go on, you think about it, you grieve about it, but overall, you just get over it. That's one of the reasons I get so "clingy" and scared when I am facing a big race or an accomplishment. You always want your parents to be proud of you and I don't have that. I have a husband who loves me and my kids and sisters, but that's it. I'll never hear "good job Sandi" from my parents, so I look for other ways to hear it, from friends and family, but when it comes down to it, I am my biggest supporter.
I am the one who tells myself "great job Sandi".
I am the one who is doing the hard work.
I am the one who is living a healthy life and proud of it.
Take the focus off your support and put it on you. It's okay to do that. Now, make a commitment to yourself and don't let yourself down. And pretty soon you'll be telling yourself as well "great job!"
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Modern Technology and Fitness
It's on the computer, it's in the computer, it's with the computer, it's inside your computer. Your workouts, your nutrition, your heartrate, your stats. But what about what's inside of you?
As you might have guessed, I am an old-fashioned girl. Nicer than what my husband calls me which is "horse and buggy". We actually got in an argument about it Saturday night on the way to meet friends at a restaurant as he is lost [I knew where we were] and freaked out when I didn't know where the navigation button was on my phone. I know the gps button, but not the "navigation" button. Huh? Anyway, he threw out the old h and b insult and the argument began.
Are computers taking over our life? Now granted I have made progress, I have a website, I am on Facebook [somewhat reluctantly] and I am blogging, but somewhere along the way, I wonder if we've lost a little bit of ourselves?
Modern technology is great. With the touch of a button, you can access e-mails, Facebook, tweets, weather, news, anything you want - anything! Your car can talk to you. You can program your workouts. You can record any tv program and watch it later. Technology has improved so much in the last 10 years it is mindboggling!
Modern technology and fitness is great. You can program your workouts. You can monitor your heartrate. You can follow nutrition plans. You can track your progress. The computer can be a great asset to your fitness program. I've had many successful clients who do just that. But they also do one more thing...they listen to that inside voice.
That inside voice that tells you when something is wrong. That inside voice that tells you that you might need to take a day off in the gym. That inside voice that tells you calories were too low for the day or too high and you need to adjust. That inside voice is something that cannot be programmed into a computer. It is your instinct, your gut feeling.
And sometimes, people get so programmed in bad habits, they lose their inside voice, or they stop listening to it.
And sometimes, people get so programmed in their computers, those lose their inside voice, or they stop listening to it.
See the problem?
So what do you do? Get rid of the computers?
Not likely. They are too important now. Even to old horse-and-buggy's like me. But you can start by listening to your inside voice. Bring the human factor back. Really know what your body is saying. Get in tune with it. Computer programs are great, but knowing yourself, who you are and what you want in life is even better. And when you start listening to your inside voice, your instinct, then you can follow the computer programs and still see results.
What's inside of you?
As you might have guessed, I am an old-fashioned girl. Nicer than what my husband calls me which is "horse and buggy". We actually got in an argument about it Saturday night on the way to meet friends at a restaurant as he is lost [I knew where we were] and freaked out when I didn't know where the navigation button was on my phone. I know the gps button, but not the "navigation" button. Huh? Anyway, he threw out the old h and b insult and the argument began.
Are computers taking over our life? Now granted I have made progress, I have a website, I am on Facebook [somewhat reluctantly] and I am blogging, but somewhere along the way, I wonder if we've lost a little bit of ourselves?
Modern technology is great. With the touch of a button, you can access e-mails, Facebook, tweets, weather, news, anything you want - anything! Your car can talk to you. You can program your workouts. You can record any tv program and watch it later. Technology has improved so much in the last 10 years it is mindboggling!
Modern technology and fitness is great. You can program your workouts. You can monitor your heartrate. You can follow nutrition plans. You can track your progress. The computer can be a great asset to your fitness program. I've had many successful clients who do just that. But they also do one more thing...they listen to that inside voice.
That inside voice that tells you when something is wrong. That inside voice that tells you that you might need to take a day off in the gym. That inside voice that tells you calories were too low for the day or too high and you need to adjust. That inside voice is something that cannot be programmed into a computer. It is your instinct, your gut feeling.
And sometimes, people get so programmed in bad habits, they lose their inside voice, or they stop listening to it.
And sometimes, people get so programmed in their computers, those lose their inside voice, or they stop listening to it.
See the problem?
So what do you do? Get rid of the computers?
Not likely. They are too important now. Even to old horse-and-buggy's like me. But you can start by listening to your inside voice. Bring the human factor back. Really know what your body is saying. Get in tune with it. Computer programs are great, but knowing yourself, who you are and what you want in life is even better. And when you start listening to your inside voice, your instinct, then you can follow the computer programs and still see results.
What's inside of you?
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